With Andy at EVE Fanfest, and the rest of the team on a post-deadline come down, nobody’s played anything new. Instead, Sam, Phil and Tom dig into their PC gaming origins – revealing the gaming obsessions of their formative years. What mystery flight sim hijinks first sparked Tom’s interest in games? Did Phil really endure Command & Conquer on a Playstation 1? How did a Mario game introduce Sam to the delights of PC gaming? All that, plus controversial opinions about Dragon Age 2.
It’s hard being a video game protagonist. Maybe you’ll run the rooftops of a pristine dystopia. Maybe you’ll unpick the mysteries of deepest, ruralist Shropshire. Maybe you’ll slog through a dungeon festooned with fiendish traps. Or maybe you’ll fight long into the abyss. And maybe the abyss also fights into you. Maybe there’s another option. Maybe there’s… the pub.
Discussed: Mirror’s Edge Catalyst, Everybody’s Gone To The Rapture, Baldur’s Gate: Siege of Dragonspear, Dark Souls III, No Man’s Sky, Overwatch.
Take a left at the road of disappointment, past the TV actor with the inconsistent frame rate. Hang a right onto the bridge of disenchantment, stopping only to acknowledge the distant giant. Up the hill of chagrin you’ll see many a chef toiling through adversity. Pay them no heed, for you have reached your final destination: the Gazebo of Despair.
Discussed: Quantum Break, Dark Souls III, Overcooked, Scanner Sombre, Wrong Wire, Frozen Synapse 2, Tokyo 42, Enter The Gungeon, Seinfeld: Isolation.
Squawked from the gnarled beak of the ancient crow priest. Snarled from the dead lips of the demonic hell beast. Painted on the bow of your upgradable boat. Spoken from a door you’re still two hearts from opening. Echoed within the monotonous buzz of industrial power tools. It’s a taunt, no, an instruction: “git gud”.
Discussed: Hyper Light Drifter, DOOM, You Must Build A Boat, Stardew Valley, The Division, Steam shame, drilling.